Renew Our Relationships

Good morning and welcome to Our Daily Walk.

Audio version at http://tinyurl.com/3cf6l5

Problems with relationships date all the way back to the Garden of Eden and the Bible is full of examples of people who had difficulties with one another. Some killed. Some argued over who was the greatest. Some churches were dysfunctional because of jealousies, factions, gossip and doctrinal impurities. Relationships are a key factor in Christian living, yet many of them need to be renewed.

Isaiah 9:6 calls Jesus the Prince of Peace, yet Matthew 10:34 states that Jesus came not to bring peace but a sword. Some conflict is to be expected in the world. Good and evil will always be in conflict.

Solomon anticipated conflict in the Proverbs and he offers great solutions. We are told to hold our tongues, avoid slander, tell the truth, speak gently, think before we talk, listen carefully, don’t gossip, avoid flattery, trust in God and the list goes on. (See Prov. 10:18-19; 12:22; 13:3; 15:1, 28, 31; 16:24, 28; 17:9; 19:22:24:26; 26:20; 29:23, 25.)

Additionally the New Testament also deals with renewing our relationships. The Sermon on the Mount and Paul’s writings are full of excellent instruction. Forgive, don’t be quarrelsome, live in harmony, show love, replace bitterness and wrath with kindness, forgiveness and tender heartedness. (See Matt. 6:14-15; 2 Tim. 2:14, 24; Phil. 4:2; 1 Thes. 5:13; 1 Cor. 13:4-8; Eph. 4:31-32.)

Problems in relationships generally spawn from one or more of the following areas.

1. The influence of Satan is evident in the world around us. Adam and Eve fell victim first and each of us has followed.

2. Personal attributes, attitudes and actions also cause problems in relationships. Greed, hypocrisy, jealousy, seeking to do evil to others all have their place in destroying relationships.

3. A lack of commitment will also cause problems. This is true not only of our relationship to God, but also in our relationship to our spouse, country, or employer. If we are not fully committed to keep our word, then our relationships will suffer.

4. And then there are communication failures. Jesus speaks very clearly on resolving conflicts in Matthew 5 and Matthew 18. He says to go and quickly communicate with someone who is in conflict. In one passage he tells the offender to go and the other passage he tells the offended to go. Sadly, many times relationships fail because these communications are cut off.

So how are we to overcome problem relationships? Here are four suggestions.

1. Remember the basics. Love, esteem others better than yourself, love one another as Christ has loved us. (See Phil. 2:3; 1 John 3:23 and Eph. 5:25.)

2. Change ourselves. Don’t accept the saying, “I’m just that way,” or “I’m no worse than the other fellow.” God doesn’t want us to be satisfied with less than what we can be. Neither will He be happy with us just to be marginally better than our adversary. He wants us to put away improper behavior, rudeness, and seek humility, meekness and a life in submission to His will.

3. Model good relationships. Look for those good examples in the Bible as well as in the world around you. Read the Bible as if the people of the Bible were speaking directly to you, instructing you in your life. Talk with those who are highly respected in business and who have a great reputation for what they do. Learn to imitate what is good and put away things that take away from your ability to give glory to God in everything you do.

4. Learn to resolve conflicts. Unfortunately we are not born with the ability to right wrongs or to resolve conflicts. We must learn these actions. Read the account of Paul, John Mark, Silas and Barnabas in Acts 15:37-41. Their contention was very severe, yet they found a solution. Later we can read of a reconciliation of those who were estranged.

It may be our human nature to strike back when hit or to reply hatefully when hurt. But God expects more from us than that. Consider Paul’s words from Romans 12:18.

Repay no one evil for evil. Have regard for good things in the sight of all men. If it is possible, as much as depends on you, live peaceably with all men.

On Our Daily Walk today, may we learn the power that God has granted us to be peacemakers on the earth. May we learn to love, forgive, guide and encourage as we struggle through the adversities of this life. May we understand that peace with others largely depends on us.

Our thought for the day: “A person cannot be a peacemaker until first he finds peace for himself.”

May God bless you on your daily walk.

© Our Daily Walk, Mike Baker, 2007. Permission is granted to copy these articles provided they are not sold and the author's name and copyright are included.